


A well loved copy

by lavaflowers (reginalpgtz)



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Bookstore, Alternate Universe - Canon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Domestic Fluff, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hatake Kakashi-centric, Icha Icha Series
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-15
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:26:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28090866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reginalpgtz/pseuds/lavaflowers
Summary: Your cozy life as a bookseller is disturbed when a box of the worst books you could ever imagine arrives at your store, and with them a certain silver haired ninja to whom you are definitely not attracted.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Reader
Comments: 23
Kudos: 117





	1. Magical Places

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this first part a few days ago, but it still had a few things missing and I finally finished it today. I’m thinking it’s going to be at least 3 parts long (depending on how much my brain allows me to write) and that it’s going to be mostly fluff and romance, but I also want to add some angst. Hopefully you’ll all like it <3 Be kind and enjoy.

“God who even reads this crap” you tell yourself as you arrange the 20th copy of the latest Icha Icha Special Holiday Edition on the hot new arrivals shelf in the bookstore. “It’s unbelievable how they keep making new editions of the same trash and people actually buy them”

Last night, your boss had explicitly told you that he wanted the books in the most visible part of the store, because they were always a massive hit, unlike the beautiful short story books you had been forced to stash in a less noticeable shelf almost at the back of the store.

You spent hours admiring the graceful prose and the magical places they took you to, wishing your own writing was half as good. You knew most of those books by heart, and every time one of your favorite authors published one, you read it so many times until you could almost recite it word by word. That’s why your personal collection of books was small, but very well loved. Whenever you got the chance, you recommended them to customers, though almost none listened to you. However, those who did, always came back to thank you for it.

_“It’s better to know one book intimately, than a thousand superficially”_ your mother told you when you were little, and to this day, the phrase stuck with you.

When your boss, the shop owner, told you to remove your favorite stories, the ones you knew _intimately_ , from the best shelves to make space for what was basically porn disguised as a romantic thriller, it felt personal.

“I’m sorry, I know they’re good, but we need to give up the space for the best selling authors” your boss had told you yesterday night when he saw your frown as you removed them from sight. You ignored him for the rest of the time you were there while going through the new inventory together, and left the new arrivals unopened

“I’ll arrange them in the morning. If you don’t need anything else I’m leaving” you slipped your very worn book in your pocket, grabbed your keys and left.

_That’s why people don’t read real literature, because it keeps getting hidden from sight and replaced with trash,_ you sigh.

Now you look towards the remaining boxes, the publisher sent way too many for your judgement, and decide to put them away in storage until more copies are needed, so you can still keep a few other not so crappy books on the star shelf.

When you’re returning from the storage room, you hear the door chime, signaling that a new customer is here. You check the time, barely 8:00am.

_God, who’s here this early?_

“IT’S HERE!” A silver haired man acting like a 6 year old in a candy store rushes in, and grabs 3, no, 4 copies of Icha Icha Special Holiday Edition without noticing he’s messing up your perfectly arranged shelf. “I literally waited a month for it! I need to read it now, it’s gonna be so good”

_Is he talking to himself? Or to me?_

The guy is bubbling with excitement, running his long fingers across the cover of the book on top. You don’t know why, but seeing the motion sends shivers down your very tired spine. You shrug, and start the computer to enter the day log into the system.

He walks to the counter, feeling giddy with the books and you get tense at the realization of who the guy you’ve been gaping at is.

The signature mask, the covered left eye and the nonchalant but confident walk give it all away.

_He’s kinda hot in person, but his awful taste in books ruins it,_ you think _._

“Would you like me to wrap those for you?” you manage to ask, pointing to the four copies he dropped on the counter. “Or would you rather do it yourself at home?” _If I were his friend I’d kill him if he gave me that as a gift._

“Huh?”

“We offer a gift wrapping service.”

“Oh no, thank you, they’re not gifts. All four of them are mine”

“All four?” You ask, confused.

“Yeah, one’s my mission copy, another is my house copy, then the back up one, and the last goes on my shelves untouched”

“You must really like the series.” You say sarcastically, emphasizing on the word really.

“They are really good, contrary to popular belief. I know a lot of people judge them, but I swear if they actually read the series, they’d know it’s not just porn” he says with a chuckle, clearly aware you’re judging him.

“Ummm I don’t know” you say scratching the back of your head “I’d rather stick to real literature”

“Wait, you’ve never read them?”

“Nope”

“Not even one?”

“No no, wouldn’t want to waste my time”

“No wonder you’re staring at me like that” he says under his breath, and you pretend not to hear him. “What do you read, then? If you’re only into _real literature_ ”

You nod towards the last shelves in the room and then gesture to your own battered copy of _The Cursed Beauties and Other Stories._

“They made me hide them away so I could make space for your special edition.”

“I’m sorry about that, maybe they can share a shelf next time.” Did he just smirk? Is he hitting on me? No, it must be me reading too much into things. “I’m Kakashi, anyway”

“I know, you’re kinda notorious amongst us booksellers, as the guy who buys too many copies of Icha Icha”

“Really?”

“No”

“Oh”

“You’re an important ninja okay?” He’s barely aware of it apparently “I have a few modern leaf history books here that mention you. And I think there might be a biography on you too, you’re definitely in the Yondaime’s. I had to read it for school, though I’m not very sure of how much truth is in it. Non ninja writers tend to exaggerate things huh? Not because I’m a ninja myself, becau-well, ummm I’m not, but I have read a lot, on ninjas I mean.” You get flustered when you catch yourself speaking a lot. He makes you nervous, alright? Even though he has bad taste in books and is a bit of an asshole, you can’t help but feel ~~attracted~~ overwhelmed by him.

You get an embarrassed smile from him too.

“I can’t imagine what in my life would be interesting enough to write about” he says, gently tapping his fingers to his temple “but I’ll tell you something, Icha Icha _is_ interesting, way more fun to read than my life. I’d leave one of these copies here for you, but this isn’t the first book in the series, so you really wouldn’t understand it. But you should give the first one a shot, if you don’t like it, you’re allowed to hate me forever and judge my poor taste in books.” He heads for the door and makes his departure, but not before turning around and flashing you a big smile that you swore his whole face was glowing beneath all those coverings.

Something about him lingers with you for the rest of the day, as if he’d never really left the store.

The next morning when you come in, you notice there’s something inside the mailbox which catches your attention, only for the simple fact that you never get mailed anything small enough to fit in the mailbox. It’s always boxes upon boxes of books and gadgets related to literature.

You open it and take out a well worn copy that has definitely seen better days, of Icha Icha Paradise. There’s a small post it note stuck on the back cover scribbled with messy handwriting

_Give it a shot, I promise you’ll like it._

_-K_

_P.S. Take care of it, it’s my favorite copy. Hopefully by entrusting you with it, you’ll decide to entrust me later with your own book ;)_

Despite all your judgements and aversions to the series and the author, you make yourself a strong cup of coffee, sit back on your familiar spot, and open the book to the first page.


	2. Pieces of you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You give into Kakashi’s book. As you start to read, you realize the book he left you has more than one story to tell. It reveals many things about this wonderful stranger who visited your shop a few days ago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really liked how this turned out and now I have a clear path as to where the story is headed. This chapter is a bit of the exposition, you’ll really get to know the MC better. Hopefully you guys like it. I promise next chapter will be happier and have the charming fluffy Kakashi we all crave and love, but I needed this chapter to give it the depth the story needs. 
> 
> Special thanks to my tumblr friend @seventh-line for editing, she’s your quality control guys! She’s preventing you all from reading a mess hehe. (the story wouldn’t be what it is without her <3 )

You run your fingers across the cover, mimicking the same motion you saw him do in the shop yesterday. For a moment, it’s not paper you’re touching, but silky cool skin.

You read the first chapter with a frown on your face, your eyes reluctantly darting from one word to the other. Before you know it, you’re through the first part of the story, and it was infuriatingly.... _good_.

The main character is likable from the start. There’s something about the way she talks that makes you want to be her friend. She’s sexy and confident, but a complex character too, with a dense storyline and fatal flaws.

You hate to admit it, but the book really draws you in. You begin to regret having judged Kakashi so harshly. You find yourself deeply enthralled, wondering what will happen next.

There’s way more story than there is porn, contrary to how you imagined it. Customers come and go and you barely lift your eyes to charge them for their items, always eager for them to leave so you can return to your reading.

You usually devour a book in a day or two, depending on the complexity of the story, but this time, you’re purposefully taking longer with each page. Not because the writer, Jiraiya, wove a prose too elevated to understand, he didn’t, but because each page held a secret message that told the story of its owner.

The book you’re holding tells two stories, the one the author wrote, printed massively, the same as the other copies you have on the shelf. But this book you have here, is unique. Its pages, the spine, the cover, they all tell a whole other story. Kakashi’s story.

_Just who are you?_ The book isn’t just a copy of a romance novel, it’s the pieces of Kakashi wound up and bound together in a single object. It tells more truth about him than his silly biography on the history shelf ever will. Each time you flipped through a page, you felt closer to that man you’ve only met once.

You encounter a dozen different things that give dimension to your mental image of Kakashi. Bite marks on the bottom left corner, probably made by a small dog. Clumsily highlighted quotes, usually romantic ones. A sticky residue from what appeared to be food, maybe dango, which would’ve made you gag usually but didn’t this time. You catch yourself smiling more than once as you go on a journey with the little pieces of this man scattered throughout.

When you get to a steamy scene, you check if the store is empty, and then indulge yourself. The excitement rises to the pit of your stomach.

The main character just confessed her love for the antagonist, who *plot twist* isn’t the antagonist. He’s always been in love with her and had just become part of the evil criminal organization to protect her. After an incredibly intense fight, he tells her the truth, and she can’t resist her attraction to him anymore. Between blood, and bruises, she melts into his body. His calloused hands grasp her hips, and he pulls in her as close as he can. He slips her dress down, and she’s burning with desire. Your hands shake slightly and your breath becomes faster, heat rushing to your thighs.

_She looks into his eyes, and threads her hands through his damp hair, making him moan hoarsely with the motion. In a deliciously slow motion he -_

You close the book startled by the sound of the door chime to see a petite woman comes into the store with two little kids.

“Y/N?” Yume stares at you in disbelief “is this really you?”

You’re always happy to see your best friend, except now. You try to hide the book, uselessly, because she’s already noticed.

“Yeah why would I not be me?” You ask with a nervous giggle, pretending not to know what she’s talking about.

She turns towards the children and tells them to go look for something in the kids section. They run towards the colorful shelves decorated with animal decals happily. Then, to you she says “I mean what in the literary hell are you reading? The real Y/N wouldn’t ever touch those books”

Your cheeks get hot and you let out a nervous laugh

She takes the book from your hands and examines the cover

“This is one tough loved book. Which trash can did you fish it out of?”

“Stop, give it back!” you say reaching for it, but she pulls it away “and I didn’t take it out of a trash can. Someone lent it to me, and they happen to take it on rough missions”

“Y/N? What are you telling me? Don’t say this belongs to a...” she flips to the first page, and right below the title she sees the sloppy handwriting where he marked the book as his.

_Hatake_

“Shinobi” she whispers as her eyes widen, a gesture of pain crossing her face.

You want to say something, but find yourself stammering and at a loss for words. You know how she feels about shinobi, and you understand, but there’s something about Kakashi that intrigues you so much, that pulls you closer to him. Not to mention how kind he was that he brought the book to you, even if he’d been cocky when you met.

“You know they’re dangerous. And Kakashi Hatake’s copy? Seriously? He’s said to be one of the worst. You know some people call him the friend killer. What does that mean? The guy is nothing _but_ trouble. Interacting with shinobi more than necessary will get you killed.”

You keep searching for words, but you cannot find them. The man you’ve met, read about, the guy who enjoys these novels, who keeps a bookmark made by three kids, who couldn’t stand the thought of you hating his favorite books, doesn’t match what she’s saying. It can’t, not for you. But you know there’s truth in what Yume says too.

He is a dangerous shinobi, he’s a known ex-ANBU, and it was true, his teammates once went on missions with him and they never came back.

“Now I don’t know if he killed them or not. Maybe he didn’t, not intentionally. But the fact is, his whole team is dead. Wherever he goes, death follows.” Yume paused, turning to stare out the window, arms crossed, “Wherever Shinobi go, death follows, or have you forgotten what happened to Kei?” She rubs the back of her head, frustrated. Her voice sounds strained now, as if going on with this conversation is too painful for her.

She takes a deep breath and looks directly into your eyes.

“Now I have two sons I didn’t ask for, and I love them. Don’t think I don’t love them, but don’t you think they miss their mother? The real one. Do you think I don’t miss my sister?”

Your friend asks finally.

You stay quiet. She takes her children and leaves without getting them anything. The remnants of your conversation leaving a dent in your heart.

You hate to see her go like that, mad at you, because you know her pain, and you love her.

Knowing those things about Kakashi should scare you away, but all it does is break your heart for him.

He shouldn’t have gone through that pain alone. Nobody should. In the end, Yume had her nephews, now her adopted sons, and her mother. You have your mother too.

As far as you knew, Kakashi Hatake, elite ninja, ex ANBU, mourned alone.

Everyday you wait for him to show up at the bookstore again, so you can prove to yourself he is the kind man you’ve found in the pages of this book. He doesn’t show up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh I hope you guys liked it. I'll probably update every week or every two weeks. Let me know your thoughts on the story <3 Be kind!


	3. The darkness swallows us both

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kakashi goes on a mission, but things don't go as planned. Injured, and with his chakra almost gone, he has a strange dream that might change something in him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! I know I'd promised to update this story every week or two weeks, but I've had a few things on my hands lately. I might take longer to update, but rest assure, I will finish the story (I have everything plotted already :) <3 This chapter was a bit hard to write, but it's necessary for the development.  
> I hope you enjoy it, and I'll try to update again as soon as I can. Enjoy and let me know your thoughts. 
> 
> P:S this chapter is parallel to the past chapter, it's just from Kakashi's POV so you know what's going on while Y/N is waiting for him at the bookstore.

There was blood. So much blood. He was supposed to be used to it. He thought he was. Before him was a sea of red, adorned with a few colorful spots sporadically distributed across the landscape. Were those in his mind?

He certainly felt lightheaded, and perhaps a bit cold. There was a dull ache somewhere in his body, but he couldn’t pinpoint the spot.

As he tried to raise his left arm, a sharp pain in his shoulder let him know the blood belonged to him. Maybe he was even injured in other places he wasn’t yet aware of, the blood was far too much for a simple gash on his shoulder.

He tried to get past the pain, gaining more awareness of his body trying to sense the usual buzz of chakra. It was almost gone too, he felt it slipping just like his consciousness. 

He didn’t panic, however. His encounters with death had been one too many, he could almost say they were part of the job. He and pain, were now old friends.

Instead, he shut his eyes gently and let his head roll back, crashing with the soft grass.

He stood in front of the bookstore, the one he’d visited a while ago, in the search of the new edition of Icha Icha. Sunlight struck his eye violently. It took a few moments to adjust to the brightness

He looked inside the store, looking for her amongst the piles of “New arrivals” “Hottest summer reads” and “All time favorites”. She was there, arranging another pile. A gentle frowning on her face, forehead creased in concentration. She was so careful with each copy, placing them in a beautiful pyramid shape, akin to the others. He couldn’t see the title of the books she was arranging, but they were surely ones she cared for, based on the way she delicately handled them.

He observed her quietly, enjoying her calm movements. It must have been hot inside, because her cheeks started flushing. Despite that, Kakashi felt cold.

A sudden urge to go inside hit him. He reached for the door handle, but his hand slipped right through. He tried again, but it seemed as if he was made of nothing. Just thin air.

From the inside, she lifted her gaze towards him, with a look of recognition, and he felt a wave of relief.

He made a move to open the door, however his hand passed right through the handle once more.

Then her expression changed abruptly, as she stared beyond Kakashi, as though he wasn’t there. Her eyes widened, fear written all over her delicate features.

Heart pounding, Kakashi turned around to see what had scared her, but saw nothing, just the plain old buildings.

She made panicked gestures towards Kakashi from the inside, and mouthed some words he couldn’t hear. It seemed like something important. there was a desperation in every move she made.

Confused, he tried again, only to watch his fingers slip through the handle for a second time.

She urged him to come in, her hands waving rapidly in front of him.

Now he was getting desperate. His head felt odd, almost as if he had stopped breathing seconds ago, and wasexperiencing a lack of oxygen.

The bookseller’s face contorted with pain, and Kakashi saw that ribbons of darkness were wrapping around her body, consuming her.

He tried to call out, scream her name, but there was nothing there.

Seconds later, darkness had swallowed them both.

He awakened with a jolt.

His heart was beating so fast, like it was trying to escape his chest. He took a gulp of air and was satisfied to feel the way it filled his lungs. He studied his surroundings and it seemed he was alone, in the middle of a forest. His body felt drained, and his head still felt cloudy, so he closed his eyes again.

“Kakashi Sensei?” Said a familiar voice.

“Is he awake?” a deeper voice asked

“I don’t know, I thought I saw him move”

“I don’t think he’s awake”

“Kakashi Sensei, can you hear us?”

Kakashi nodded slightly, eyes still closed due to the sickness, though he know recognized the voices as Kurenai’s three students.

“Try not to move much, Sensei. I’ll go fetch Sakura, Hinata stay here with him. Make sure he’s okay.”

"Yes, of course"

Hinata sat next to him and kept quiet. Her silence was very much appreciated by the tired jonin.

He must’ve fallen asleep again, because when he regained consciousness, Sakura and the Godaime were staring down at him.

“Oh good. You’re awake. I’ve cleaned most of your serious wounds and given you medicine. All that you need to do now is rest so you can restore your chakra.”

The hospital’s cold atmosphere gave him a strange sense of serenity. He didn’t know how he got here, hopefully he hadn’t been too much of a burden on the team.

“Now that we know he’ll survive, tell me, Sakura. What went wrong?” Asked Tsunade as she finished wrapping one last bandage around Kakashi’s arm wound.

The mission was supposed to be simple. Locate and report. He’d done it so many times, and this time, he had a really good team with him. Team 8 and Sakura had come to help him find one of Orochimaru’s rumored hideouts.With their talents as trackers, they managed to find the location quickly, however, they weren’t expecting to be met with a dozen of Orochimaru’s experiments, led by none other than Kabuto.

The kids were good fighters, but the odds weren’t in their favor with the enemy doubling their own numbers. Kakashi’s instincts had kicked in, so he put himself between the young shinobi and Orochimaru’s men, if one could even call them human. Kakashi took them all out, though it had come at a great cost.

His chakra reserves were almost emptied, and his wounds had caused him to lose too much blood. That’s how he ended up here.

Kakashi was deemed unfit to fill out the mission report, due to his injuries, a silver lining in this mess. Sakurameticulously explained everything to the Godaime, turning in a beautifully written, and extremely detailed report, unlike the one he would’ve done.

His time in the hospital went by excruciatingly slow. He had a few visits, none very interesting since they all lasted at the most 5 minutes. Everyone was busier, and not even Gai had had the time to entertain him as usual. Kakashi had been desperate to get out of there.

The only thing that seemed to occupy his mind, was the image of the bookseller, as he flipped through the pages of his book. However, that too left him uneasy, as he recalled the images he had seen in his delirium. Whenever he pictured her, a deep fear gripped his heart, as he was reminded of the darkness he’d seen swallow her. Nightmare or not, he needed to get out and see her.

———-

Kakashi was discharged from the hospital two weeks later, just in time or he would’ve attempted an escape.

He now stood in front of the bookstore again. His hand shook as he grasped the handle, but immediate relief hit him when he made contact with the warm metal. He sighed, and pushed the door open, eager to see the face that had haunted his dreams.

"Hello, welcome to _Red Leaf Bookshop_. Can I help you with anything? _"_ Called out a petite woman from behind the counter. His stomach sank when he realized, it wasn’t whom he’d been looking for.


	4. A pleasant surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s been long since you last saw Kakashi. You almost think he’s never coming back to get his copy. After a very pleasant day at the bookshop, you run into a pleasant surprise on the streets.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone. Yes I know I suck at updating, you’re allowed to hate me. But I swear on my two dogs’ honor I will finish this fic. Even if I take long in between chapters. I take time because I really want you guys to get a quality story, so I write and rewrite it until I’m completely satisfied. 
> 
> I’m so in love with the story, and I really want you all to see what I have planned. Please enjoy this chapter, don’t forget to like and comment, it motivates me a lot. Be kind <3
> 
> Also, if you guys want to see more of my work inbetween chapters, my blog on tumblr is @hatake-no-sharingan and I post a lot of small fics there :) I'm very active over there, so you can see what I'm up to while waiting.
> 
> Special thanks to my great friend and editor @seventh-line for being so patient and kind with me. This story is alive because of her. <3 I hope you enjoy it.

You take a sip out of your iced coffee. The sweet taste of vanilla cream makes you smile, and after you swallow, you take a bite of your buttery pastry.

The day is hot, but very beautiful. The colors of Konoha looked more vibrant under the summer sun, giving you the feeling that you were wandering inside a painting.

You had a busy morning in the bookshop for a change. The owner had started to get worried because business had been slow for the past month, but today many customers came in searching for some fun summer reading. You’d enjoyed the morning like you hadn’t in a long time. Many of your regulars came by and you chatted for a while with them, delighted to hear news about their lives.

Megumi san was looking for children’s books because her little girl had just started reading. Time had passed so fast, as you still pictured little Hana newborn. Kia picked out a couple of mystery novels to read to her grandfather at the hospital. Daichi-kun decided to spend his allowance on the newest graphic novels, having more time on his hands with school over.

When Yume showed up, around noon, you asked her to take care of the store for a bit while you took a break and grabbed a snack from your favorite coffee shop. Your argument was forgotten now, and you two were as good as ever. You told her you wouldn’t get involved with shinobi any more than necessary, after you realized Kakashi was most likely not coming back for his book and tried to move past the issue.

Sure, sometimes you’d still feel a small thrill whenever the door chime rang, a deep part of you hoping it was him, but your conscious self was fully aware that it was a silly thought. You were better off without shinobi in your life anyway. As soon as you realized that, you sought Yume out and apologized to her, recognizing your foolishness.

You’d been starstruck by the man, and of course you’d fallen for the way he’d lent you his copy. Is there anything more personal than that? It’s such an intimate move. But you could see it now. It clearly didn’t mean much to him since he wasn’t planning on coming back to get it. He probably had more copies at home anyway. You’d moved past the incident and were now focusing on re-reading a poetry collection you hadn’t read in a while now, fighting the urge to pick up the second Icha Icha book .

Yume apologized to you too. She knew she’d treated you too harshly and she’d let herself get carried away by her hurt. She’d only worried about you because she was scared about losing you too. In the end, you both talked it out as you always did whenever you had a problem.

You smile after savoring your food and head towards the store. Half an hour has already passed since you left her in charge, and with such a busy day, you doubt your boss would appreciate you slacking off.

You cross the street humming your favorite song and focus on the sight ahead. Distracted by the sight of the beautiful blooming tree on the other sidewalk, you felt someone bump into you, causing you to dropyour half full iced coffee, and the remainder of your buttery pastry to the ground. You clutch your shoulder as you feel a slight pain from where you were the hit.

"Hey idiot, didn’t you see me crossing?" you snap at the stranger. You pull your gaze from the fallen foodto get a look at him. It’s in that moment when you realize, he’s no stranger.

"I’m so sorry, let me get you anoth-"

" _Kakashi,_ " the way you say his name is a cross between a whisper, a prayer and a thank you. You don’t know who’s more startled now.

He’s wearing a cast and a sling to support his arm, and there’s a fading bruise just under his right eye. On the other hand, he looks as surprised as you do. As you notice that, you become self conscious.

You both stare at each other for a few seconds until he breaks the spell

"I was looking for you" his silky voice soothes you “I’m sorry I crashed into you, how about I make it up to you”

You nod as he picks up the fallen reminders of your lunch, and you both walk to the other end where he disposes of them.

“Can I walk with you —“ there’s a pause and you notice he seems to be looking for something.

“Y/N.”

“Y/N.” he repeats, taking time to savor the sounds of your name, like honey on his tongue. It was almost as if he’d been waiting all this time to say them.

You walk in a hesitant silence. You had a dozen questions running through your mind ready to leap out of your lips.

_Why didn’t you come sooner? What happened to you? Why did you lend me the book? Did you feel something, the way I did? Who are you, Kakashi?_

The questions stay put, however. You both stay quiet perpetuating the awkward moment. You arrive at the bookstore stopping at the entrance.

“Well, it was nice to see you. I’ve got to get to work now.” you say not entirely sure if it sounds genuine.

You turn towards the door

“Wait, Y/N,” he grips your hand “when does your shift end? Let me at least treat you some ramen, to make up for crashing into you earlier”

Your stomach flutters, surprising you. You try to play it cool and reply simply

“You can come back at 6:00”

He nods, and you get back to work.

You find Yume in the back room, arranging a few copies of a book that didn’t sell well, in order to make space for storage.

“Good, you’re back.” she smiles at you “Just in time, I have to pick up the kids from my parents’. Did you enjoy your break?”

“Yes, it was nice. Thank you so much for watching the store for me”

You avoid mentioning your meeting with Kakashi or the fact that you’re going out with him later. _It’s no big deal,_ you tell yourself. _We’re just getting ramen and maybe discussing the book. That’s all. It’s not worth upsetting Yume._

The rest of your evening passes by slowly and uneventfully, giving you time to overthink the situation. The image of him being hurt haunts you. The bruises, the bandages, you’re treading on dangerous territory and you’re afraid. You remember your argument with Yume, the state Kakashi was in is proof of what she said. Yet another part of you wants to understand the man, not the shinobi.

Finally, the clock hits 6:00, you turn off the lights and head outside. He’s not there.

You wait for a while, and when 10 minutes pass, you start to think he’s maybe not coming. After all that time, and he disappears again.

You pull out the copy he lent you and start reading to pass the time, refusing to believe he’s letting you down again. You absentmindedly run your fingers through the ridges you now know so well, hoping time will go by faster.

“The wondrous bookseller finally deigns to read IchaIcha. That’s my copy, right?”

His voice startles you, making you gasp. _Damn she looks cute_ he thinks as he sees your reaction.

“So did you like it?” He gently grasps your arm and begins to guide the way. You don’t know where he’s taking you, but you follow his lead. After a while of walking, you finally broke the silence.

“I think I know too much about you, just from reading this book”

“Oh yeah? Like what?” he challenges, his curiosity piqued.

“First of all I know you’re an irresponsible teacher, because you read porn in front of your kids” you say teasing

“Okay yeah, I’m guilty of that.”

“I know you care about them too, because you left your bookmark in there. And I know you didn’t make it, it’s too pretty, so I’m guessing the girl, _Sakura?_ Made it. I saw the names Naruto and Sasuke on the bookmark, but their handwriting is too bad for them to have painted it.”

“Yes that’s also true,” he laughs, and it’s obvious to you that he cares a lot for them “What else did you learn?”

The exchange is amusing him too much. It never did cross his mind how much of him had been left in the book. He was just beginning to realize the extent to which he was attached to his copy.

“You like dango. There was a sticky smudge there. It almost made me gag.”

“Well, you’ve got it wrong there,” he chuckles “I hate dango. That was actually, Gai. He’s kind of my best friend. If you can call it that. Just don’t tell him I said that, if you ever meet him."

You spend the time during dinner laughing at his jokes. Sharing silly stories from the bookshop, and hearing his own misadventures with his students. The conversation is lighthearted, and soon you turn towards Icha Icha. His eye glows with excitement, silvery specks dancing in his iris. He asks you about your favorite moments, and you have to admit it was hard to choose. The narrative is compelling and well crafted. You discuss the ups and downs of the heroine and her adventures. Heat pools in your stomach when you mention the success of the steamy scenes. They’re much more poetic than you’d thought they would be.

Kakashi seems pleased, it’s a personal victory for him.

“I’m ready now,” you say, “for the second book. You made me wait a month for it, and I really, really want to know what happens."

“You haven’t read it?”

“No”

“Why?” He runs his fingers over his forehead protector, confused.

“Because you only left me the first one."

“Don’t you work in a bookshop? I thought you had them all.”

“Ehm, well, yeah, but—“ you blush, “it’s not the same if it’s not your copy. I mean, I like reading yours. I love your annotations, and you imprint them with a little bit of yourself, even if messy sometimes.”

He smiles as if he’d just won a prize

“Well then, we’ll have to remedy that. Let’s go get it then, my apartment is nearby anyway."

_Run now, before it’s too late. Go before you fall prey to the shinobi world, run before you know the person behind the mask._ You hear Yume’s voice in your mind. _You can’t leave once you’re in. You can’t turn back._

You’re prepared to walk away, but he opens the door to his place and a warm musky scent invades your nostrils. His calloused fingers grasp yours and he guides you inside. You feel safe, you want to be embraced by all this. That’s when you know, you’ve already begun to fall.


End file.
